Um, Toto…

Yesterday was a first for me. The tornado siren blew and down to the basement we went. We had to wake Lily up and she did great. I was the one who was a nervous wreck. John, in the kindest voice he could muster said “now remember, don’t squeeze the baby too tight.” ::eyeroll:: Yeah, that’s going to calm me down. All I could think of was this Dateline or 20/20 (they’re all the same) piece I saw years ago, when I had no fricken clue I’d ever actually live somewhere tornadoes were possible, where this poor woman huddled in her closet with her newborn when a twister ripped through their town. They found the baby the next day…I’ll just stop there.

Right now we are in the middle of another crazy storm that is supposed to last all night (side note: sky lights are really cool, except when it’s raining cats and dogs then they get a little loud) and we just got back from my 2nd trip to the basement. Lily did fine again and I was a little more calm. I was chatting with our friend Ryan who moved down to Texas from WI earlier today and he said “ignore the sirens, when you hear a train coming then you run.” I never, ever want to hear that freakin train.

Facebook = time suck

Holy Moly! I just joined Facebook and it is a CUR-RAZY time suck. I’m having fun though as I’ve connected with a few “lost” friends. One in particular I have known TWENTY YEARS – since I was a senior in High School. That just doesn’t seem right. How can it have been TWENTY YEARS?!?! Dude – I’m old and it sucks!

I find this interesting

2007, I’m not sorry to see you go. Hello Twenty-oh-eight!

I have to be honest and say that 2007 wasn’t my happiest year. I was exhausted for most of the first half. Lily wasn’t what you’d call the best sleeper. I shudder at even recalling what John and I lived through. Being first time parents we were just doing whatever worked and that seemed to be holding her whenever she slept. It seems so crazy now, but it kept her quiet and those moments were few, far between, and precious. I finally got to that place where I just couldn’t do it anymore and I actually laid her down in her crib (Thank you, Sleepeasy!). I think she was almost 5 months old. Things got a little better, but it took until the night before her 12 month appointment for her to sleep through the night. The little shit knew I didn’t have the guts to tell her doctor that I hadn’t in fact weaned her night feedings like he told me to do at her 9 month check-up. Like most things, Lily does them in her own time.

My marriage took quite a hit this year. It was touch and go there for awhile whether John and I would make it to a New Year as a cohesive unit. We prayed and talked, fought and prayed. Let things simmer down and then slowly worked our way back to being in love. Or rather I did. He never stopped, so major props go to him (and Him) for sticking with me. That was definitely some “or worse” coming into play. Why did things go awry, you ask? Well, I went a little crazy after Lily’s birth. I can say now that I am on the other side that I had some PPD going on. I didn’t want to admit it, I was scared that I’d lose Lily because of my weakness and having her was the only thing I truly cared about. You think you are prepared for something and then your legs get washed out from under you and you go into survival mode. I lived my life for months by just getting through 15 minutes at a time. Things started to get a little easier, a little better each day and there even started being some entire good days. I look back now and wonder if having some pharmaceutical assistance wouldn’t have made things a whole lot better a whole lot quicker. I’m pretty sure it would have.

After making it through all that we had to decide to stay and plant roots or find a new place to dwell as our apartment lease was up and we couldn’t live in that tiny space any longer. We talked, researched, put out feelers and then made the decision to stay. A house was purchased and here we are. Midwesterners for the foreseeable future. See my previous post on how I feel about that.

With all of that behind me, I’m actually very excited for the new year. Renewing my relationship with my Lord and Savior, my husband, with my friends and family, and with myself. I’m also excited for all the changes Lily will go through and the ones I will too. Hello, 2008!! You’re going to kick ass!

It’s my own damn fault

About six months ago the decision was made for our family to stay in the Midwest. I’m not lying when I say I regret this decision each and every single day. That doesn’t mean it was the wrong decision when everything is factored in or that there aren’t things here that I love and enjoy, but when I look outside and see the gloom and when I hear that we can expect to get another six inches of snow tomorrow I just want to take myself out back and kick my ass for not getting us the hell out. I could be here.

I guess this is where I grow up and realize that as a family this is where the Lord wants us to be. John’s job allows for us to live nicely on a single income and Lily will be able to know some extended family. We have a wonderful church and I’ve made some really great friends, but I just HATE the winter and knowing that it will be six more months before we thaw out. Besides, Lily would be 10 times cuter with a Southern accent.

Share and Share Alike

This past Friday night and Saturday morning our house was quite active and not because we were partying like rock stars. Well, maybe we were if they are the kind that end their parties with projectile vomiting. Lily caught a stomach virus that is making the rounds and because it is impossible to not get what your kids have, I then got the joy of seeing what I had for dinner leave my body at a high rate of speed. Through it all John was, you guessed it, a Rock Star! He changed crib sheets like a pro (4 times before we gave up and just laid her on a blanket) and drove from store to store until he found some Pedialyte at almost 2 in the morning AND because he’s just that awesome he grabbed some Gatorade for me as he had a feeling I’d be next. My husband, the genius. Best spontaneous decision I’ve ever made.

I’m pretty sure Lily picked this bug up from Thursday’s playgroup. She’s still at the age where everything goes in her mouth and so are all the other kids, so yeah, germ spreading heaven. I used to try to stop her from doing this while at playgroup, but then all I’d be doing is following her around taking things out of her mouth and I’d have so much less time to chat with the other moms which, face it, is what playgroup at this age is really all about. So, I guess this will be the first of many winter ickies that invade our happy home, at least now we have a good supply of Gatorade and Pedialyte on hand.

Ho, ho, ho!

I read that someone somewhere wants Santa to say “Ha, ha, ha!” instead of “Ho, ho, ho!” This is just insane, people, it goes too far. I know the whole “Merry Christmas” vs “Happy Holidays” greeting gets people into an uproar, but I’m not one to get too uptight over it and come on, we all know Jesus wasn’t actually born on December 25th, Rome just needed to replace a pagan holiday, so I’m okay with people saying Merry Christmas or Happy Holidays, it doesn’t offend me. I think boycotting stores who have their clerks say “Happy Holidays” is actually a very ignorant thing to do. Newsflash, not everyone who shops in December is Christian, nor is Christmas the only religious holiday going on. How would you feel if you kept having people say “Happy Chanukah” to you all the time and you weren’t Jewish? This isn’t majority rules, this is supposed to be a season of joy, hope, and peace. Let’s all be a little more tolerant, isn’t that was Jesus wanted in the first place? But what’s this I hear, someone wants to mess with Santa? “Ho, ho, ho” is what Santa says. End of story. I don’t care if it is the urban slang for 3 whores, it didn’t start off that way, so take your “Ha, ha, ha” and shove it up your ass!

Oh, hello there.

I’ve been kicking around the idea of starting another blog for awhile now. I hear about or read things I want to comment on and realize I have no place to do that. I come up with witty posts in my head and think about how my friends and family would enjoy such frivolity, but alas, where’s a girl without a blog to share such things? Well, this spankin’ new blog is the answer!

I found myself a little scared to get back into the blogging game. There are SOO many blogs out there with wonderful writers (you can find a few of my faves to the left) and does the world really need one more mommy blogger? I say “Yes!”, so here I am! Woo Hoo!!